Racism – The Evil You Cannot Unsee

Photo by Angela Roma on Pexels.com

I am an immigrant. I came to the US in the early 90s at age 18. The only information about the US was from television.

On an island, many things are imported to include tv shows. I was addicted to the conflict between Alexis and Krystle in Dynasty, I was in suspense with “who shot JR?” laughed with the antics of the Cosby kids who were the only decent black family on US tv, Westerns depicted every ‘Indian’ as savages except the ‘half-breeds’ who were docile and I cried at the horrors of Roots.

When you live outside the US, it was customary to believe that the people who lived in the US had tree lined streets, picket fences, kids, dogs and two cars in a garage. The shows about racism were hard to comprehend because I never experienced it nor had any concept of being disliked for one’s culture or skin colour.

Coming from a mostly homogenous culture with people who looked like me populated every strata of society, racism seemed ridiculous and flat out stupid. My adjustment to the US was about opportunity and understanding the ways of a new land until….

My First Racist Experience

If you are old enough to remember the popularity of AOL and its distinctive sound when it finally connected online, then you should remember the rage of chat rooms. The idea of typing with distant others was exciting. Those were innocent days where one could access a Christian chat room as easily as a dirty-talk chat room.

It was in one of those chat rooms I met this Caucasian guy who said he was my age and lived in the suburbs of Queens, NY. Obviously, I was excited at the prospect to meet someone who lived in one of the boroughs.

During our chats, he asked certain stupefying questions. After discovering I immigrated from an island, “did you live in trees?” I was taken aback. I answered sarcastically with the belief he was genuinely stupid about life outside his small world. He extrapolated that because many people in Africa lived in trees, then islanders probably adopted that practice. He could not identify any Africans who lived in tress so, it shifted to huts which I again had to educate him.

“Do you live in the ghetto?” Frankly, I was brand new to the US and I had no idea what was categorized as a ghetto. He pressed, “does your Burger King sell fried chicken?” Again, I never ate at Burger King so I had no clue what they sold.

“How dark are you?” I had never been asked to classifying my shade of brown. I struggled to intelligently respond and in an attempt to highlight the stupidity of the question, I asked “how white are you?” He never gave me an explanation as to what prompted that ridiculous question. Needless to say, we never met because he repeatedly insinuated that he may be shot if he came to my area.

I continued in my innocence even though those conversations lingered uneasily.

Years later, after I became more aware of racism in the US, it dawned on me that I that my first racist experience with that online guy. The second racist encounter was while riding the subway. A group of white boys said “nig*er” as I walked past. For a second, I was confused about the unprovoked random verbal attack or were they using that word during a conversation?

Racism Taints

Living in the US exposed me to racism and sadly, there is no take-backs. I became aware of my skin colour and to be cautious about places and people. However, that knowledge and experience had no impact on how I treated people. When I went away to college, my friend group was multicultural to include a white girl from Utah. The family who ‘adopted’ me during college was a white couple who loved multi-racial and multi-culturalism. Over the years, I made great friends who are white.

During an initial mental health assessment with a white young soldier, he shared that his childhood was rough. He grew up in a dysfunctional home and poverty. Him and his family moved to a city where he attended a majority black school and experienced frequent racism. The soldier pointed out it would have been easy to hate all black people but he choose differently. He also befriended a black older mentor who helped him during those turbulent years.

In the context of this article, racism is defined as hating, biased and aggression towards someone solely based on their race or skin colour.

Forward March

American society is not anymore racially charged that it had been in the past. Some people are just more prickly about addressing the issue. The US has an ugly racial history that many currently would like to nullify with censorship and laws.

Evil will continue in the face of willful ignorance.

The current discussions about racism should not be about guilt but awareness and change. Pretending that racism is extinct in the US and worldwide does not make it magically go poof. It is ignorant and damaging to believe that if you have never experienced it overtly or covertly, it does not exist. On the other hand, everything is not about race and every white person is not a racist. The frequently improper use of the proverbial race card creates desensitization to a very real issue. The most ignorant people are the ones trapped in their own self-centered box.

We all have biases and a touch of racist views. The moment of distinction is choosing to either manage those prejudices or nurture the monsters into irrational hate.

Meeting different people taught me so much about other’s culture and experiences. In this age of information, people willfully choose fear and ignorance. Frankly, I would not have had these diverse opportunities living on an homogenous island or avoid broadening my worldview. I cannot unsee racism but I choose not to spread this infectious disease.

#the greatest of all these is love

I extend an open invitation to discuss your views and experiences on racism in the comments.